Thanks so much for this article and your work! Part of the struggle with "going natural" is that it reveals all of your own self hate and also reveals how deep featurism really goes because you are treated very very differently. And I can definitely remember trying to get my nose to look smaller with makeup when I was younger. Going natural pushed me outside of many elite white dominated groups that I felt at home in with texturized hair and I had to really fight not to go back to using lye. This is something we have to do for each other, so that future generations don't have to compromise their health for access and acceptance.
I’m glad you bring this to light for Black women and to open the eyes of white women too. It’s already an impossible standard for a white woman in American (exposed to the gloss of magazines in the checkout aisle, Insta filters, and the constant barrage of how ads telling us we need to look younger, etc) to live up to but women of color face further intersectionality as you point out- hair treatments, skin color, facial structure, etc. I have had to turn off most of this advertising media in my life for my own health and sanity because I am the way I am and I’m grateful to have this body to inhabit even though I’ll never life up to a single beauty standard (I have a large frame, thin hair, wide feet, and am only 5’1” for example).
When it comes to the hair dyes and chemicals, they are also filled with teratogens and mutagens, which can potentially hurt our offspring or health as we age. I would like to see women of all sizes and backgrounds step up in the modern beauty industry to create many realistic models of beauty with health at the center. The current model is built on shaming women into believing there’s something wrong with us so we’ll shell out dollars to fix our imperfections. I’d like to think that without living under the thumb of a critical patriarchy, all women could step forward and claim their unique identity and beauty in a more dignified way. After all, we want to be human first and have others recognize us for our minds and hearts and actions rather than have to perform “femininity” as a mindless Stepford act for the comfort of men. I think more women of all backgrounds are slowly creating kinder and more environmentally friendly products for women, but still, I’d like to see more acceptance of women the way that we are being recognized as beautiful. (call me a dreamer…)
Our bodies, including the cultural aspects of our appearance, are often where we wear our pain on the outside. This is why I never comment on anyone’s weight or hair or clothing choices; we are often signaling our past trauma through the way we present ourselves. So I stay gentle with people. But there seems to be so many who are comfortable berating Black women about their physical characteristics, hair especially, but weight, clothing, even eyelashes too. Black women are not seen as “women”, and they know it. The great anthropologists Zora Neale Hurston said “The Black woman is the mule of the world”. And she was right. Any attempts they make to be seen as female is ridiculed; weaves, nails, lashes, etc. it is not about self esteem, as the writer notes, it is about being acknowledged as female, in this society that means having hair longer than a man. Men are attracted to their opposites in appearance. Black Women are not even allowed to want love. I hope that the writers who seem dedicated to shaming Black women for wearing their pain on the outside will extend to Black men, who want nothing to do with women who’s heads are similar to their own. In Africa when the woman wore short Afros, they also went shirtless. In the Amazon too. You’ve seen National Geographic. Maybe we need a better understanding of gender, and not just race? Or maybe Black Women simply are not allowed to have pain or not be the mules of the world without being berated? It’s not possible to be of African descent and not feel ugly in this society. The writer doesn’t seem to have much mercy for navigating this dilemma. I hope Black women ignore this and look to their souls. That’s where the treasure is. Even if no one cares.
Thanks so much for this article and your work! Part of the struggle with "going natural" is that it reveals all of your own self hate and also reveals how deep featurism really goes because you are treated very very differently. And I can definitely remember trying to get my nose to look smaller with makeup when I was younger. Going natural pushed me outside of many elite white dominated groups that I felt at home in with texturized hair and I had to really fight not to go back to using lye. This is something we have to do for each other, so that future generations don't have to compromise their health for access and acceptance.
I’m glad you bring this to light for Black women and to open the eyes of white women too. It’s already an impossible standard for a white woman in American (exposed to the gloss of magazines in the checkout aisle, Insta filters, and the constant barrage of how ads telling us we need to look younger, etc) to live up to but women of color face further intersectionality as you point out- hair treatments, skin color, facial structure, etc. I have had to turn off most of this advertising media in my life for my own health and sanity because I am the way I am and I’m grateful to have this body to inhabit even though I’ll never life up to a single beauty standard (I have a large frame, thin hair, wide feet, and am only 5’1” for example).
When it comes to the hair dyes and chemicals, they are also filled with teratogens and mutagens, which can potentially hurt our offspring or health as we age. I would like to see women of all sizes and backgrounds step up in the modern beauty industry to create many realistic models of beauty with health at the center. The current model is built on shaming women into believing there’s something wrong with us so we’ll shell out dollars to fix our imperfections. I’d like to think that without living under the thumb of a critical patriarchy, all women could step forward and claim their unique identity and beauty in a more dignified way. After all, we want to be human first and have others recognize us for our minds and hearts and actions rather than have to perform “femininity” as a mindless Stepford act for the comfort of men. I think more women of all backgrounds are slowly creating kinder and more environmentally friendly products for women, but still, I’d like to see more acceptance of women the way that we are being recognized as beautiful. (call me a dreamer…)
I had no idea this was current activity in American culture. I always learn something new from your articles.
Thank you.
Our bodies, including the cultural aspects of our appearance, are often where we wear our pain on the outside. This is why I never comment on anyone’s weight or hair or clothing choices; we are often signaling our past trauma through the way we present ourselves. So I stay gentle with people. But there seems to be so many who are comfortable berating Black women about their physical characteristics, hair especially, but weight, clothing, even eyelashes too. Black women are not seen as “women”, and they know it. The great anthropologists Zora Neale Hurston said “The Black woman is the mule of the world”. And she was right. Any attempts they make to be seen as female is ridiculed; weaves, nails, lashes, etc. it is not about self esteem, as the writer notes, it is about being acknowledged as female, in this society that means having hair longer than a man. Men are attracted to their opposites in appearance. Black Women are not even allowed to want love. I hope that the writers who seem dedicated to shaming Black women for wearing their pain on the outside will extend to Black men, who want nothing to do with women who’s heads are similar to their own. In Africa when the woman wore short Afros, they also went shirtless. In the Amazon too. You’ve seen National Geographic. Maybe we need a better understanding of gender, and not just race? Or maybe Black Women simply are not allowed to have pain or not be the mules of the world without being berated? It’s not possible to be of African descent and not feel ugly in this society. The writer doesn’t seem to have much mercy for navigating this dilemma. I hope Black women ignore this and look to their souls. That’s where the treasure is. Even if no one cares.